In a world that is so confused over what it means to be a man or woman, the Catholic faith is such a gift. With the example of numerous female saints, Church teachings and the guidance of our Blessed Mother, we can truly find a beautiful image of authentic womanhood to emulate.
One of the best ways I have been formed in an understanding of true femininity is through the teachings of Pope St. John Paul II. This influential modern saint wrote a lot about God’s intentional design of creating mankind as male and female and what that means for the human person. One thing that John Paul II focused on in his theology of the body is how the human person can only come to fully know oneself and how he or she is made in the image of God through an embrace of his masculinity or her femininity. Yes, our feminine nature is an essential part of our humanity.
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So what does this mean for our lives? St. John Paul II explains that one of the ways we are made in God’s image is through our ability to love, through our ability to give of ourselves to another. In giving of herself, the woman specifically discovers her full personhood and embraces her feminine vocation. In turn, when the woman is accepted by another person for who she is as created by God, John Paul II says that her femininity is revealed in its fullest sense. This plan for humanity was intentionally created by God to be beautifully lived out in marriage, where man and woman fully give of themselves, body and soul, to each other. Through this reciprocal gift of self, the husband embraces his masculinity and the wife her femininity, and through that, they accept their full humanity as persons made in the image of God. Just like God is a lover who gives of himself to us, we are also called to this gift of self.
This beautiful design for womanhood is the reason why so many single girls long for marriage and motherhood. We see giving of ourselves to our spouse and children as the main way to fully embrace what it means to be a woman. And this is a beautiful thing! What a gift it is to recognize this calling.
But if you have not yet found your spouse, alongside this recognition of authentic femininity comes a season of singleness that can often feel like a long and monotonous waiting game. While the deep longing for a spouse is not something to look past and deem meaningless, there is still meaning to be found in your life in the meantime.
Friendship
As simple as it is, one way you can embrace your femininity as a single woman is through friendship. I am so grateful for the years I have been single because they have allowed me to devote the time and effort it takes to cultivate truly authentic friendships and to learn what it means to simply be a good friend. Through loving my friends and family, giving myself to them through my time, energy, gifts and talents, I am embracing my femininity and my vocation to love.
One specific way I have found to do this is by hosting. Creating a space for friends to gather together, and for me to serve them through food or drinks, brings me joy because it allows me to give of myself. Although I desire to one day embrace this calling by creating a beautiful home for my own family, that does not mean I cannot do this in some capacity and truly live out my femininity in this current season.
Creativity
The other way in which we see that God made man as male and female in his image is through our ability to create. While mankind imitates our Creator in marriage, in which man and woman participate in the work of God’s creation through motherhood and fatherhood, this creativity is much broader than procreation. In John Paul II’s “Letter to Artists,” he articulates that “all men and women are entrusted with the task of crafting their own life: in a certain sense, they are to make of it a work of art.” In whatever way that looks and in whatever season of life that is, you are called to create something beautiful with your own life.
I think about the vocation to create often, and while I wait to live out this calling through motherhood, I have found so many ways in which I can embrace my femininity through creating right now. Whether it’s through putting together a beautiful outfit, making a home cooked meal or baked goods, or decorating a room, we create beauty. By recognizing the ability to create beauty in small ways, as reflections and appreciations of the beauty of God’s creation, we can fully live out our femininity.
The feminine vocation
While many of us roll our eyes at phrases such as, “There is a purpose to this season of singleness” or “Enjoy this time,” maybe there is something in these sayings. The desire to love, to give of yourself to another, and to create beauty is a real human desire; and as a woman, it is part of your vocation that you can embrace right now. Whether single or dating, engaged or married, mother or spiritual mother, your feminine nature is a complex thing, beautifully and wonderfully created by God to make you more like him.
